Being Bewitched

I grew up watching Bewitched, like so many others did. I remember thinking Darren was such a dick for treating his wife that way. Just from talking to others through the years about the show I know I'm not the only one that felt that way. But we do need to remember that it was a different time when that show was aired. A time when women weren't equal and witchcraft was even less acceptable than it is today. Still, I struggle with the idea that Darren tried so hard to force Samantha to be someone she wasn't.

But the truth is, for as much as I don't understand it, I went and started playing the role of suppressed witch anyways... I have an incredibly wonderful husband. He's kind and gentle, giving and hard working. He loves his kids and I more than he loves himself, and he would work non-stop if it meant we could have the things we want. And although he doesn't agree with many of the things I stand for, he usually backs me up, at least in public - although he may have a few things to say in private from time to time...  AND, for as wonderful as he is, he's afraid of witches, magick and even his own gifts...

Yes, that's right, I married a Christian muggle who would dance for joy if I somehow forgot my path... Unlike Darren he doesn't in any way try to force me to change who I am, and he did know who and what I was long before we got married - I didn't spring it on him like Samantha did. But he's no less uncomfortable knowing that his wife is dancing naked in the moonlight than Darren was when he discovered his mother-in-law had swished her hand and alters life as he knows it - AGAIN!

So, needless to say, it keeps things interesting. And it takes some bending, on both parts. My husband does his best to keep his mouth shut and I do my best to keep it out of his line of site. If you're living with a muggle like I am, one who is less than accepting, you know what I'm talking about. For those who are living with someone who is more Darren like, then here are MY suggestions on co-existing...

• Be open and honest with your partner. Don't think that hiding things, or keeping secrets is going to make issues disappear, if anything, it will only make things worse. 
• Don't try and force your beliefs on your partner. Their beliefs may counter yours but they are still entitled to their beliefs. It's important to remember that many people fear witches and Pagans because they don't understand us, and that changing those beliefs can take time.
• Agree to boundaries. If your partner is of a different faith, the idea of having an alter in every room or of having a drum circle in your living room every full moon may be more than they can handle. But, they may be more willing to agreeing to watch the children while you meet with your coven. 
• Do your best to keep your home a neutral ground. No huge pentacles on the wall, and no chanting over dinner... 
• Take time! My husband and I have been married for 6 years, and in that time we have come to respect one another's beliefs and even find common grounds on many occasions. But it's taken time for us to get this far. And it's taken love... 
• Above all else, remember that you are more than a witch, and more than a Pagan. And that your partner loves you for all the other parts, they will learn to love the witch part, as long as you keep reminding them why they fell in love with the rest of you in the first place!

Bewitched Forever!
Blessed Be!